Lets clear this up

Dear Girl,
     You are very very stressed.  You are going through a lot of shit right now.  When  1  thing goes wrong, 11 things go wrong.  I understand that and feel your pain and send you healing love.

     You need to de-stress so that you can think straight.  Sit still and breathe gently.  Google a meditation online and sit and breathe along with it to still yourself.  You cannot  help yourself by being in an agitated state.  I know you are detoxing.  Just do your best and  try to sit still….  and still yourself and find the peace within and forget the outside world, the cops, the drugs, the punching, the candles.  Let everything just pass through you like a soft breeze, or a gusty breeze, and just let go and be peaceful.     This small vacation from your woes will give you some space to relax. and find some peace.   Then you can think  more clearly and regroup to face your challenges.
big hugs and lotsa love
namaste _^_, mimi

Aw man! What a crap run! Just stay true to yourself. I know when I feel totally stressed and like I'm about to freak or relapse, I clean my house. Yeah it's silly I know…but it gets the energy out of me so I can move forward. The cops may indeed be targeting you. They did to my younger brother. Just keep your nose clean and prove them all wrong! You can do it!

Have you felt the energy swirling around you in the last 12-24 hours?  You have been very much on the minds of those who care about you. Thankfully, you have these brightest spots in your life to be grateful for on Christmas.

First, I bless your dad and stepmom for taking you in.  You could be homeless or with strangers this Christmas Eve.  Though it may not be easy to be home as an adult, I know, I've been there, you are safe and warm and loved (even if you feel the sting of any disappointment).

Second, I bless the police for removing your boyfriend from your life.  Once a man breaks whatever invisible boundary he may have against hitting a woman, he will do it easier the next time and even easier the following.  Regardless of how he may apologize, you will never know when the next blow is coming.  If he tries to come back into your life, run like hell.

Can you get a public defender to try and help you with the car situation?  Can you find a legal aid society in your area?  I am assuming that your dad isn't willing to help you with this.  A former employer once took my car.  My parents would not help but my in-laws went with me and sat by my side at the police station, as I explained that it wasn't mine to take from me, as it belonged to the lender that I owed.  My in-laws sat beside me when I faced my former employer in court.  I was blessed with learning the true meaning of family with these experiences.

Experiences come and go and change is the only constant.  There is much hope for you.  I know about the kind of addiction you are struggling against.  It ruined my first marriage and could have ruined me but I left and started over.  You can too.  But don't look for easy fixes, they will fail you every time.  Don't trust offers of help that should not be reasonably offered you for they may be wolves in disguise.  Trust your dad.  Trust legal aid.  Trust whatever counselors work with you in the Methadone program.  It is worth it and the drugs are not going to ever get you where you want to be.  I will write you privately, more about my thoughts regarding dealing with the core issue - which is not the drug.

But you know that already.  You know there is a larger picture to all of this.  I am proud of the efforts you have shown me.  You are making active efforts to change the direction of your life.  The metaphysical approach will cause the environment and circumstances around you to shift and the impact over the long run can be significant.  I am glad you brought my attention to this.  Someone else had also brought my attention to your circumstances last night but he (Fee/John) appears to have quit Zaadz over a multitude of reasons - not directly related to you.

Please stay in touch.  I wish you a bright and happy new year and new direction in which to take your life.

Write me privately any time.

Deb

I so admire you for sticking to your plan, for doing what you have to do to get better in the face of all the adversity.  Keep up the good work.  You should be proud of yourself.  Let the things that don't support you fall by the way - that is inevitable.  You are getting better and that's what is important.  You are remembering who you are and how great your life can be, so keep on that path.  I'm grateful for just this opportunity to get to know you a little better, even if we both relate in this virtual/computer setting.  I feel you heart and it IS full of love and vitality.

Live from your heart and you can't go wrong.  I wish for you a peaceful Christmas.  Don't worry about the Fees of the world, they will always be there.  Look to those who support you with unconditional love.

Celebrate this time as a new birth, a time of new beginnings, a time to start anew - Look forward and do not look back.  Greater things are to come.

Peace, my friend,
Satya / John

Earthdweller!

Speak your words of power! This is important for your own personal transformation!

Your higher-self and the universe have teamed up to create circumstances that make you admit what you have been wanting to tell the whole world for a really long time…..and here is your chance!

So, shout it out at the top of your lungs from the hilltops high to the valleys low:

“I am no longer using! I am finally in my truth and can say this with every fiber in my being!

Sometimes we create our own situations, which piss us off, but the situation serves a deeper purpose….to encourage that we find our power through self-expression, not because of someone else's lies, but because it needs to be said….by YOU to the rest of the world!

Yes, Brian..I agree with you. sometimes we do create our own situation…

I also agree with Debyemm re: 2 blessings…1) her father and stepmother and 2) the cops …At this time all may feel as if you are under attack, but as said, you are not on the street and what would of/could of happened if the police did not intercept?

ABOVE ALL…look at you!  YOU are doing it Shannon! PRAISE yourself! WE are all PROUD of you! CLIMB the hilltops, as John said, and SHOUT, SHOUT, REJOICE! For you are on the rise of being a new person! Screw all the obstacles! Hurdle them!

Please know we are all here for you and we are cheering you on. Make this New Year your BEST year!

I love you and am sending all positive energy to you! Stay strong.

I am with you also.

Love to you,

Doug

Fee / John / AJF,

Actually, I only knew you were showing up as “deleted”.  Others that I have known to show up that way, actually quit, confirmed to me by impartial friends of theirs.  So, what was I to think?

I had already written here, in response to Shannon's direct request that I come here and read, when you showed up in my personal mailbox, under a different name - after being booted.  Yes, I know now how proud you are of that accomplishment.  I know not the details to judge whether you should be or not.

Perhaps, you just wanted to prove you could push some people far enough to actually do it to you?  I don't know.  I know only that you say you are banned and your old screen name Fee is deleted.  I do wonder that they haven't caught up with you but it's not my business and I don't know the rules regarding alternate identities.

Why, this drives you nuts, I don't really know.  Getting deleted against your will is making your self a victim - or perhaps you see it as a martyr.  Quitting is an act of personal control.  I gave you the benefit of the doubt, from my perspective.

Still, I wish you all the best and hope you find that free for all place that doesn't believe in any censorship whatsoever.

OK, I came back, but I do want you to know it was not to correct it.  I just came to see what Shannon had written since I was here last but you still got your wish.  Darn that Law of Attraction strikes again.

Deborah

Helloooo
What about earthdweller?
Isn't this  blog about earthdweller?
Maybe we should get back to earthdweller.
Help earthdweller.

No disrespect here to anyone, but perhaps anyone who is at odds with each other should take it to private.

This blog is for Shannon. It is very disrespectful.

Yes, I totally agree and I strongly apologize for being battered into posting back to John / Fee / AJF.  I've spent a great deal of the last 48 hours back and forth with him PRIVATELY.  He is insatiable in his need for attention.  I told him I need a break and would prefer not to go back on the friendship route w/him for ahile.  Anyway, we were doing ALOT privately but he was crazy about it getting blasted all over Zaadz that he got banned.  And he tried to divert attention from himself in my Living Metaphysics pod (taking over Shannon's thread) and with me personally by claiming that we should be focusing on Shannon but it has been alot about him and I've lost way too much sleep pursuing it.

So, I just want you all to know that I've been following Shannon's status whenever it shows up on my profile page and with her privately and in the pod.  I am sorry to have gotten dragged into this diversion and to have yielded in the direction of satisfying this person and getting him off my case.  It should have been ONLY about Shannon whose blog this is.  Please forgive me, I can only claim Christmas/Santa stress and not enough sleep and constant private badgering that my saying he quit didn't do him the justice he deserved.

Deborah

PS However, I do take responsibility for not resisting.  I'm not a victim, I just understood that he was frantically obsessed that the truth be everywhere he was mentioned.  Integrity? I need to look up the definition.

Ahhhh…..life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
that struts and frets his hour upon the stage
and then is heard no more: it is a tale
told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
signifying nothing.

– A line from William Shakespeare's Macbeth, from Act 5, Scene 5:

I hope it is understood that the above quote is directed towards no one, but is directed at LIFE and IRONY!

The only point was perhaps that this wasn't the place for you to right your wrongs.  Though her title is fitting for your clearing up misconceptions about your status.  I simply felt pushed and pushed by you - regarding Shannon when I was already helping her in the way I know to do and regarding your wanting to become the Zaadz martyr of the year.  Sorry but you really are making a big deal out of it.  I have tried to explain to you that this is a commercial site, paid for by someone and therefore their property and entirely within their right to censor you.  That you have found a way to “rise from the dead” so to speak and circumvent their intent is a fitting enough way for you to protest that you do nothing wrong - ever.  That you are misunderstood and loved by all, that you never cause controversy or if you do, it is because you are so totally right about EVERYTHING.

One thing you are not right about - I have no religion - religion is for people who are afraid of hell.  There is no hell in my consciousness but that I already went through, earlier in my life.  Spirituality is the practice of taking control of one's own life.  Now, if you were to admit that you were in control of getting banned, that you did get what you were wanting to all along, to become the cause celebre, then that would be practicing a spiritual recognition regarding your earthly life.

Sorry, Shannon.  I will respond no more on your blog to John / Fee / AJF.  I promise to only do so privately from now on and take the stage back away from him in your space.  John, I don't dislike you, I'm just weary of your antics.

We are financial services. We are not interested in emails about your religion. You are the one who can't let it go. Please stop sending emails.

I feel like I am in grade school!  “tit for tat” Could you both start another blog to carry this over to?

Wow… writing a comment, posting then deleteing after it was responded to, well, that does not make you a nice person. 

This is beginning to look like stalking…
If you both want it to stop, like you both say…then STOP responding to one another.

PLEASE…this space is for SHANNON, you know the person this blog was started by? PLEASE be respectful and give her consideration as she is reaching out for help, friendship, kindness and understanding!  Something that your recent posts do not project.

Fee & Deb - I know you mean well, but STOP IT, STOP IT, STOP IT !

This is about Shannon and not the 2 of you being in disagreement.  Please disengage this activity from this blog.  You have co-opted this entirely and made it about the 2 of you.  Maybe not meaning to do that, but you have.  Now STOP IT.  How fucking inconsiderate can you get?  Really.

YEAH Shannon! We look forward to hearing from you. Much love to you.

Shannon,

I am so happy you'll have a convenient computer again soon.

Deb

I apologize for my abrupt but somewhat appropriate language earlier.  Glad you'll be back posting with us Shannon.  We do miss you.  Glad things are working out.

I am happy too that you are back here posting and keeping us up- to d-ate on  how you are progressing.  We are here to support you.
hugs, mimi